The Difference Between Knowing About God and Actually Knowing Him

Based on John 17:3 — “Now this is eternal life: that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent.”

I spent years learning about God before I started learning to know Him.

And for a long time, I didn’t know the difference — which is, I think, the most dangerous kind of confusion a believer can have. Because you can be busy with all the right things — Bible study, prayer, church, small groups, ministry — and still be operating at a distance from the One all those things are supposed to connect you to.

Jesus defines eternal life not as a destination you go to when you die, but as a quality of knowing that begins right now. “This is eternal life,” He says in John 17:3, “that they know you.” Present tense. Active. Relational. Not know about — know.

The Greek word He uses is ginosko — intimate, experiential, progressive knowing. The same word used to describe the relationship between a husband and wife. God isn’t looking for students who can pass a theology exam. He’s looking for lovers who stay close enough to learn His heartbeat.

Frank Viola makes this point in a way I’ve never been able to shake.

In Jesus Speaks Today, he writes that most Christians have inherited a transactional faith — one focused on what Jesus did rather than who Jesus is right now, alive, present, and actively speaking. “Christ is not a historical figure we study,” Viola writes. “He is a living Person we encounter” (Jesus Speaks Today, p. 33, Frank Viola).

That sentence reframed my entire spiritual life.

I grew up learning the stories of Jesus. I could narrate the feeding of the five thousand, explain the Sermon on the Mount, and debate the theological implications of the resurrection. But I had been relating to Jesus the way you relate to a biography subject — someone you know about because you’ve read the book.

What I was missing was the living, breathing, present-tense Jesus. The One who still speaks. The One who still moves. The One who is, right now, interceding for you by name at the right hand of the Father.

Bob Hamp describes the core problem this way.

Most believers, he says, are living from a “performance-based identity” — relating to God from the outside in, trying to become acceptable through what they do rather than receiving who they already are in Christ. The result is a faith that is exhausting, guilt-driven, and ultimately hollow — because you can never do enough to feel truly close to God if you’re relating to Him as a judge to be satisfied rather than a Father who has already accepted you (Think Differently, Live Differently, p. 71, Bob Hamp).

This was me for years. My devotional life was driven by duty more than desire. I read my Bible because I was supposed to. I prayed because I felt guilty when I didn’t. My spiritual disciplines were functioning as a performance rather than a relationship — and deep down, I knew it.

The shift came when I stopped asking, “What do I need to do for God today?” and started asking, “What does God want to be for me today?”

That’s not laziness. That’s theology.

Paul writes in Galatians 2:20, “I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me.” The Christian life, at its core, is not about my efforts to reach God — it is about God’s life living through me. The vine doesn’t strain to produce fruit. It simply stays connected to the root, and the life of the vine does what life does naturally.

Graham Cooke captures this beautifully: “The Christian life is not about trying harder. It is about receiving more deeply. You don’t grow by adding discipline on top of emptiness. You grow by letting the life of Jesus fill the places that are still empty in you” (Being with God, p. 58, Graham Cooke).

That is the inside-out life. Not behavior modification dressed in religious language. Not a self-help system with Jesus sprinkled on top. But an actual, real, moment-to-moment dependency on the living presence of Christ within you — letting His life become the engine of your transformation.

Here’s the practical challenge.

Most of our Christian formation systems are built for information transfer. Sunday sermons download content. Bible studies analyze text. Devotionals provide daily inspiration. None of this is bad — but none of it, by itself, produces the ginosko that Jesus describes. You can know every doctrine about God and still feel profoundly distant from Him.

The Lifechoicely framework exists to close that gap — to build a life where knowing God is not just a theological category but a daily lived experience. Not through more programs, but through intentional practices that open you to encounter. Listening prayer. Contemplative scripture reading. Identity-rooted decision making. Spirit-led daily rhythm.

John Eldredge calls this “the life you were created to live” — one characterized not by religious busyness but by genuine, two-way communion with a God who is not silent, not distant, and not vague. “God is always speaking,” Eldredge writes. “The question is not whether He is communicating — it’s whether we have built a life that allows us to hear” (Walking with God, p. 22, John Eldredge).

So let me ask you directly:

When was the last time God surprised you in your devotional life? When was the last time you sensed Him speaking something specific into your situation — not a general verse but a personal word? When was the last time your faith felt less like a system you maintain and more like a relationship you’re actually living in?

If it’s been a while — or if you’re not sure it’s ever happened — that’s not a reason for shame. It’s a reason to start. The door into ginosko is not achievement. It’s simply availability. Turning toward the One who is already turned toward you.

TAKEAWAY LESSON:

Eternal life is not a future destination — it is a present quality of knowing God that begins the moment you stop relating to Him from a distance. Shift from knowing about God to knowing Him, and everything changes.

Practical Step: This week, before you open your Bible, pause and say out loud: “Jesus, I’m not here to study You. I’m here to be with You.” Then read slowly, listening — not just learning.

— Ed Baulete Lifechoicely.com